It's just your baby...

IMG_4525I was asked recently why having a natural birth was so important to me... I knew I had a reason. I knew I did. But in the moment it took me a while to gather my thoughts, let's blame it on preggo brain... I started writing this more as a way to organize my inner monologue and thought it could maybe help someone, so there you go.

I never for a second considered having an epidural or any kind of pain meds during labor. I fully realize that they are a marvel of modern medicine, but it never even crossed my mind. My mom had natural births. My 2 best friends had natural births. I hate pain, but I believe in the power of my own body. So with my first son it never even presented itself as an option. I told friends "if I change my mind during labor, then I will" but I only said that to make people feel better. I knew I wasn't going to. I knew it. I also, through much research, found myself constantly seeing connections between interventions such as inducing and epidurals and the slippery slope leading to stalled labors and emergency C sections... Ummmm, no thank you.
With that decided, I begin to pray every day. Every time I was in the car or waiting for the doctor. I prayed and prayed and prayed. I prayed for all the specifics of my labor. I wanted an 8 hour labor (I was a realist). I wanted to go into labor at night so the midwife would be at the hospital. And I wanted to use zero pain intervention. The power of prayer is strong because I had all of my prayers answered. Did it hurt?! Like a son of a bitch. Did I survive it?! Absolutely, like a boss. Would I change a thing?! Never. The second my baby was on my chest the work was forgotten and I had literally had control of my entire labor and birth. I didn't have doctors telling me when to push. I knew. My body knew. I was so focused I had no time to worry or stall my labor. I was in it 100% and that control was just beautiful.
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So back to my answer. I had a natural birth because I was meant to. That may sound silly, but it was all I needed to know. Now with my second baby due in just 9 weeks I'm facing these questions and decisions all over again. And I've found myself giving advice, offering opinions [when asked] and my main point to those asking is know WHY you want it and don't allow yourself or others to think otherwise. Surround yourself with people who support and believe in you and your body. You need to know you can and will get through labor. You need to remember with each contraction that is just your baby making his way to you. You need to know that it's the most beautiful and primal thing you can ever do. You need to know the amazing power you possess.
Now, sometimes medical intervention is absolutely necessary and praise The Lord for doctors and midwives who know what they are doing, but I would just ask you to know your options. Don't just accept everything you are told. Be educated. Trust your instincts. Take classes. Hire a Doula. Watch documentaries. Be involved in your birth story no matter what path you choose!

Blissful Baby, Take 2

blissfulbaby2blissfulbaby5 blissfulbaby7 blissfulbaby9 blissfulbaby11 blissfulbaby12Images Kelsey Erin Photography | [Dress] Hatch Collection here and here [Booties] Sam Edelman

Well, the Captain's done it again. We are so excited to be growing our little family, and yes, it was on purpose! Arriving August 2016. Stay tuned to watch me get chunky!

#NurseryFail

DSC_0887-(ZF-8413-57929-1-003)[So cute and sweet, but LIES!!! All LIES]

You know when you see all of those adorable baby rooms on Pinterest and think, oh my gosh, so sweet. That just looks too good to be true! That's because it is!!! Beware! You are being lied to!!! Gasp! And you thought the internet was a beacon of truth. These sweet Pinterest nurseries only look like that until the child can move, then all bets are off. I have to admit I wasn't thinking about a moving, grabby, no napping monster baby when I decorated our nursery… I should've, ohhhh I should've… It was so sweet and cute for the first 3 months when I only went in his room to rock in the rocking chair. Needless to say we had some serious function issues and I have decided to share my knowledge with you now. You're welcome friends.

IMG_22671. Forget the wool rugs. We love our gorgeous West Elm shag wool rug, it's beautiful and it was a killer good deal, but not only is it a shedding nightmare, it gets vomited and drooled on like ALL. THE. TIME. We are already planning purchasing a nice super soft cotton rug. This one tops the list.

IMG_22652. Hang everything out of reach of grabby, grubby hands… and feet. I love our art work and I still think it was the perfect aesthetic choice, but maybe not hanging it so close to his changing pad. Like dude, I have been waiting to be hit in the head by one of these things and finally took them down the other day.

IMG_22663. Cover 'dem windows. Our "blackout" curtains were a flipping joke and when our little guy refused to nap in anything other than a pitch black room we improvised. I was told by a friend to bust out dark plastic wrap a la "Dexter Style." We went more ghetto fab and threw every damn thing we could find over the curtain rod. BOOM. Black out shades only a college student could love.

4. Keep wattages wayyyy down. Our lamps are brighter than the surface of the sun and instead of buying the proper low wattage bulb, again, we just throw a whole bunch of shit on top of the light. Are you seeing a trend?!

5. Cords, cords, cords. Damn, my kid loves to eat cords!? What the heck!? You think oh my kid won't try to kill himself by getting tangled in cords or sticking his fingers in light sockets until he's a crazy toddler… Oh no, think like 4 months… They aren't very bright, think about how to hide cords and keep them out of reach when you first design the room to keep you from having to reconfigure the space!DSC_0891-(ZF-8413-57929-1-007)

So much for my beautiful nursery… But Honey Badger don't give a fu--- You get it.

Moms Everywhere: I'm sorry I judged you…

BubbaI'm sorry I ever judged you for being late, canceling, or asking me to be ridiculously "available" so we could meet for lunch because I didn't realize how delicately a good day and a bad day rested on an extra 15 minutes of nap time... Blasted nap time. I'm sorry I ever spoke the words, "if they don't create flexibility in their babies life they will never learn!!" I'm clearly an idiot who needs to be flogged. Flexibility!? HA! You are lucky if you can find some semblance of a routine with a baby, you are entirely flexible, but it's about knowing how your baby will thrive and that trumps just about everything… Including a much needed meal of food with friends. Sorry boos.

I'm sorry I ever scoffed at a 5pm dinner request. Heck, is 4:30 too early!?!?

I'm sorry I judged that you didn't have all wooden and bpa-free shit for your kid to play with. Who was I kidding!?! What do you want!? What will make you happy!? Plastic? Toys with sharp edges!? TV!? Hell, I'll give you all of that!

I apologize for ever uttering the words "non-toxic" or "organic" in your presence. Self explanatory. See above.

I'm sorry I ever assumed that after you had a baby you were right as rain when even those with the healthiest mental fortitude are filled with so much emotion that can be downright exhausting all on it's own, no mind you also have a tiny person to keep alive.

I'm sorry I ever judged you for being absolutely exacerbated and annoyed by this creature that you "supposedly love and cherish." Dude, there are days where you are so absolutely NOT enthralled with being a doting mommy. It's exhausting and sometimes infuriating. And on top of never quite knowing what your spawn needs, you are so exhausted you don't even know what YOU need. Have I bathed today? Brushed my hair? My teeth!? Have I lost all ability to use proper personal hygiene!?!

I'm sorry I ever said, "I'm tired" in front of you because I had probably gotten at least 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep the night before and I'd probably get it again that night. So basically I was a dick head.

I'm sorry I ever shot you a judgmental sideways glance as you donned yoga pants and a top knot, AH-gain because I assumed you care what others think. That's not to say you don't care about your appearance, but there are days were your outfit and coiffed do take a major back seat to a catastrophic blown out diaper or a disaster of a nap time. And guess what, that's okay!?!?

I'm sorry I didn't write this sooner! I know I've written similar posts, but this one has been on my mind for a few months, but it's just now finding it's way out of my head over the past week. After talking to my mommy friends there seems to be an overwhelming feeling of inadequacy amongst Mothers, that needs to end now. I know it's hard. I daily find myself wanting to do something better or have to more patience or to be more present in the moment… I am trying to remind myself that each day is a new day and when something doesn't work today, I can start over fresh tomorrow. But what none of us needs is pressure to live up to anyone's unrealistic standards, sometimes even our own.

Love them. Cherish them. And for the love of geez-o-petes give yourself a break!

But First, Coffee

sleeplessssss.001So part of me feels like people don't want to hear about how effing tired I am, but there's this other part of me who A. doesn't care and B. feels like it's complete bullshit if I pretend to have a perfect baby who sleeps perfectly and shits perfectly… I don't even know what that means, but I've seen bloggers with beautiful family pics of their amazing baby who not only brings joy and perfect piles of perfect poo, they sleep through the night and even started working a part time job to pay for diapers… It makes me mad, like, rullll mad. I know a ton of moms read these blogs and think, Shit, what am I doing wrong?! Nothing, you're doing nothing wrong!! Around 4.5 months MohawkRoc completely forgot how to sleep. So for the past month or so we have gone back to the basics of getting him sleeping through the night. We are dealing with "the rolling over" phase and he's yet to master rolling back so he wakes up on his tummy very angry-like… but enough of that, here's what has been sustaining us during our sleep fast. [1] Fuel. There are a variety of must have beverages: h2o, coffee, and beer… not necessarily in that order. Hydrating is super important and La Croix coconut sparkling water is my favorite thing in the world. I toss back these things like a boss. Donut Shop's Coconut Mocha coffee is INSANE delicious, I mean so good. I've never needed coffee before, but that is not the case any more. I don't do cream and sugar, but lately I haven't been digging my usual super bitter black coffee. Enter this coffee. It's so crisp and yummy you don't need to add anything. Then there's the booze. Banquet Beer. Cheap and tasty. Perfect when you just need a light beer with dinner to relax your brain from thinking about how you probably aren't going to sleep tonight either… le sigh… Oh and let us not forget to eat. We live off of Chipotle. Brown Rice. Beans. Veggies. Gauc. Lettuce. Relatively healthy, cheap, and fast. Boom. Enjoy with cold Banquet beer.

[2] Wardrobe. It's imperative you have stretchy lounge pants acceptable to be worn in public and a good hat… Boom. Pair with a cute tee or tank and you look like you give a damn, but we all know the truth... Not only do you not remember when you last gave a damn, you also put your underwear on inside out this morning and can't be bothered to fix them… not that I'm speaking from experience...

[3] Beauty. So eye cream is my new best friend. I've actually been using the whole line of Renée Rouleau products and I'm really impressed with the results, but this eye cream is brilliant. Total Eye Repair. Because, DAMN, we need to repair those eyes. And forget wearing your hair down, your kid is gonna pull all that shit out, like giant chunks of hair, and then they are going to try and eat it… Weirdos. I love these Emi Jay hair ties, they help you avoid hair headache!

[4] Entertainment. Our attention spans are pretty pathetic these days, but once the monster nugget is asleep we like to snuggle and laugh our asses off. Currently, we are obsessed with Blackish and The Mindy Project. We also love Modern Family, New Girl, About a Boy, and Brooklyn 99.  All VERY funny and while we might not know much, we know funny. We also watch The Walking Dead, but we right now we are a few episodes behind. CARRLLLLLLLLLLL.

[5] New Challenge. Journaling. I opened up to a wonderful friend about how the exhaustion was really weighing on me. I feel tired to my core. It's so hard to do anything well when you are that worn out and that can really start to affect your mood. I had been praying for rest for Mohawk and for The Captain and I and was just really feeling unheard, my friend suggested journaling and just keeping all those thoughts fresh in my mind and having an open and honest connection to my feelings and to God.

Hope this helps in some small way!! It helped me just to right it out!! So ladies, I want to know what are your must haves when you are utterly exhausted!?!

A Freshly Picked Review!!!

DSC_0395-(ZF-0383-30534-1-004) DSC_0391-(ZF-0383-30534-1-001) DSC_0400-(ZF-0383-30534-1-002)DSC_0392-(ZF-0383-30534-1-005)DSC_0403-(ZF-0383-30534-1-003)photos via Kelsey Erin | [moccs]c/o Freshly Picked | [note] Baby Roc was not having it ^^^

First, let me say that my normally jovial baby was NOT impressed with mommy's photo shoot. He was an angry angry elf. Not cool, Rocco, not cool. Alas, we have a grumpy model, but luckily the FP moccs are so cute it doesn't even matter! Since I have the super strange obsession with cameo these days, I couldn't resist. Let me tell you, these puppies are well worth the money!! They are made so well and with quality materials. I lalalalove the elastic to help keep your nuggets from kicking them off every chance that they get. We did a size 2 and they are a bit big, I swear I measured right, so I'm def going to have smaller sizes for our imaginary second child. I have a few pairs of larger sizes, but I could kick myself for not having any of their "crib moccs" basically a size zero for 3-5 months. I think these are the perfect baby shower gift!! I gave a pair of the gold to a friend and let me tell you, they were a hit!!! I mentioned it during our giveaway, but I just love Susan Petersen and her amazingly unique story!! This is a business that I feel good giving money to, plus, come on!?!? They are the cutest freaking moccasins on the market! Obviously, I'm a huge fan, go buy a pair or 3.

Freshly Picked Giveaway!!!!

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I am soooo excited to announce a super fun giveaway with Freshly Picked. We are going to be giving away a pair of fabulous FP moccasins!!! Hooray!! You may recognize the brand from, CEO, Susan Petersen's awesome appearance on Shark Tank! LOVE HER! They make the most fashionable baby shoes on the market!! From all the hip mommy bloggers to the Kardashians people are obsessed and rightful so! I am in love with these moccs, I mean, all the cool kids are wearing them.

FPI am so pumped to be giving away a pair of these moccs in the color and size of the winners choice!!! YAY!! To be entered all you have to do is like Blissful Happenings and Freshly Picked on Facebook then comment below with your favorite pair of Freshly Picked Moccs and how you'd style your little one!!! For one extra entry you can like us on Twitter and for 2 extra entries you can subscribe to the blog by email over on our side bar>>>>>> Log all of your entries below, note, it may take a minute to load especially if you are on a mobile device!

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fp2Be sure to share with your friends!!! Thanks for stopping by!! Good Luck!!!!