¡Feliz Cumpleaños!

FullSizeRender_3FullSizeRender_1 I’ll start by saying I had a wonderful and hilarious post completely finished when Wordpress screwed me over and deleted it forever. Now I am rushing to rewrite everything with the same humor and detail in the 6 minutes I have before Mohawk wakes up. I hate you Wordpress, go eff yourself.

I am not an entertainer. Every time we move I find myself uttering the words, “oh this is a great space to entertain.” Why?! I have no idea. I am never going to throw a party. I like small gatherings 3-5 people. I can cook a really nice meal, get a few bottles of really nice wine... I love cooking lunch for friends. I just think small, I suppose. So I’m not entirely sure what enticed me to throw a “yay we aren’t homeless/surprise The Captain birthday” party. But alas, we did it and I’m pretty sure it was a success.

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The Food. Let me start by saying I am not a meat eater. Like, I’m the opposite of a meat eater. Now I’m not an ethical vegan or at least I didn’t start out that way, so I don’t refuse meat in my house or berate a waiter if my falafel is fried in the same oil as something meaty... I’d rather not have my food in contact with meat, but I try to remain reasonable. I would rather take the hit and leave someone with a positive memory of a vegan than some cray person who made them feel like crap. I like to keep an open dialogue about the way I eat. Anywho, I’ve lingered too long here. You get it. Well, I decided on a taco party and scoured Pinterest for the easiest taco recipes and moseyed over to the grocery store. I sailed through the veggies, beans, salsa. I didn’t even bat an eyelash at the cheese and sour cream. But then... The meat counter. Oh. MY. VOM. Beef!? Yikes. I literally haven’t purchased raw beef in over 13 years... I was pacing back and forth for at least 15 minutes. I googled “does brisket have another name?” I had to finally ask a stranger to help me find brisket. He looked at me like I asked him to help me find Narnia. He did, however, eventually point me to a brisket. A 7+ pound brisket. Ew. I tossed it in my cart wrapped in plastic away from anything I would be eating... I moved on to the chicken, which wasn’t as foreign, I ate chicken up until about 6 years ago... I quickly eyed what I wanted and picked it up only to find it was covered in chicken juice. CHICKEN JUICE ALL OVER MY HANDS. I started looking around desperately for a paper towel or hand soap, then I started dancing about like I was going to pee myself. I eventually calmed down and double bagged that shit like a boss. As I was walking away I heard a women say to me, “chicken is so gross, isn’t it?” as she hauled a few cartons into her cart. You have no idea lady. NO. IDEA. Now luckily The Captain put the meat in the crock pot for me and shredded it, so all I had to do was fill the crockpots with veggies, veggie stock, and whatever else they called for that was veggie friendly. Everyone said the food was amazing and I am inclined to believe them because it was almost entirely gone at the end of the night. I made this chicken, this beef, this rice, and this bean recipe as my staple items!

FullSizeRender_2 copy FullSizeRender_1 copy FullSizeRender copyThe Booze. Since I had requested that people surprise The Captain with a boozy delight and an entertaining note, I knew we weren’t going to need as much liquor, so we opted to keep our drink list small yet plentiful. We made this delicious sangria via my food spirt animal the Minimalist Baker. We had Mexican beer, Mexican coke, and bottled water all in galvanized tubs along with cups of sliced limes. I would have photos, but all of our guests were ridiculously on time and I was barely able to snap shots of the food before it was destroyed.

The Fun. We rented a few lawn games which everyone seemed to enjoy! We have a huge yard so it was perfect! Oh and the piñata... that’s right I bought a monster truck piñata and filled it with mini bottles of booze... because I love my husband and this is ‘merica where you can do whatever the hell you want!!  We also had a cake. An ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins!?!? Who the hell am I!?!?


The Drunks. Well the party started at 4, people were pleasantly buzzed and The Captain had completely succumbed to the dark side around or before 8:30. I was surprised to find the next day that even the “pleasantly buzzed” were actually closer to the black out/vom the night away drunk than I had thought. They just hide it better than old man river, I suppose. I think it was an exciting evening, even sober people were locking themselves in our guest bathroom. Par-TAY!!!! We put The Captain down for bed around 9 and people started filing out around 10, I had the intention of kicking everyone out around 10:30. What?! I was gonna be up by 6 the next morning. You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here.FullSizeRender copy 2

The Hostest with the Mostest. I will say, it’s not easy to entertain for a large number of people. Cooking, cleaning, introducing, and trying to make sure everyone is enjoying themselves is hard!!! I didn’t have one drink all night long, but I really did have fun. It’s absolutely exhausting, but so gratifying to see people talking and laughing and having a good time!!! I finished all the dishes and cleaning before 11 and I definitely ate 4 or more gluten free/vegan chocolate chip cookies, in bed, while looking back at photos of the party. And I’m happy to report that Mohawk went down around 7 around stayed asleep through drunkards slamming the bathroom door, yelling over FaceTime, and Mariachi music blasting. That’s my boy. But I think we will pass on that massive first birthday party... Momma’s partied out.Processed with VSCOcam with a6 preset

Christmas Party Time!

Blissful Happenings  2 - 61 Blissful Happenings  2 - 62 Blissful Happenings  2 - 63 Blissful Happenings  2 - 65 Blissful Happenings  2 - 68 Blissful Happenings  2 - 70Photos via Kelsey Erin Photography  | [pants] old Loft, but these are amazing!! [top] old Loft [shoes] ancient Steve Madden [ring] Nordies Rack  [lips]  Ombre with Mac Morange all over and Russian Red painted around the lip line then blended in. It's the holidays and that means Christmas parties, oh so many Christmas parties. This year I was determined to wear this outfit! I purchased the look for NYE 2013 which ended up being a total drunkfest in the privacy of my own home, which I like to tell myself is responsible and not super lame. I was determined to wear these pants somewhere!!! This is might be the only outfit I've ever purchased straight from the mannequin and it literally shocks people when I tell them it's from Loft! That store is toats one of my secret affordable weapons. I purchase one of these shirts once a year, it's a staple and looks so expensive!! That's the beauty of Loft, it's great to mix with higher end pieces to create a super unique style of your own! These are my favorite shoes which are total knockoffs of the Dior Addict gladiators that prance around in my dreams. Yep, I'm still crushing hard on those Diors. These are Steve Madden and they are cray comfortable, I wish they still made them. They are blatant copies, but dude this girl doesn't have 800 bucks to spend on shoes and I definitely didn't have it 4 years ago. I hate the lack of artistry in copying a designer piece, but I think that the prices of designer fashion have only gotten more and more insane!! Conundrum of the heart. Anywho, we had a blast at our Christmas party, ugly sweaters, engraved toilet seats, apple pie moonshine, olives!!!! I could go on and on. We love our West Coast military family!! So blessed to have such wonderful friends in our lives!!!!

Bridal Shower Mayhem

ShowerDecorWeddings, ahhhh, Weddings. I dig a good wedding. Heck, I wrote wedding blogs for 2+ years. I love weddings. I've been in 5 weddings as a mostly-adult, but this marks the first time as a real bridal shower host. First, I was Maid of Honor [as promised in every yearbook since kindergarten] for my bestest bud when we were barely 21. I was still in college and broke as a joke, so I sorta threw a shower with my mom and the church ladies. Then was my little sis, again, super poor... I was planning my wedding too, so I don't remember how that shower went down. I know, such a jerk. After that was my dearest friend who had a surprise wedding. Yes, it was exactly as awesome as it sounds! So yeah, no shower. This year I was in two weddings. One AH-mazing affair in beautiful Negril, Jamaica and due to all of the travel, while I ended up being able to surprise my wonderful friend for the shower, I didn't get to help plan. So this July I had the opportunity to host my first real-life-grownup shower. My lovely friend Shirk Shirley got married to her Guido Prince Frankie. We had a mostly vegan shower-- what??? If I'm buying the food you best believe it's going to be healthy of sorts. Em, the ginger, hatched most of the decor ideas and the curly haired babe, Marilyn, did the drinks and baking. I, of course, made all of the food! Here are some shots of the day.Bridal Shower Entry TableShowerDecor2Veggie Bridal Shower Buffethummus cupsCaprese SkewersBridal Shower Vegan CupcakesTheGirlsLotsaWineWine is the best! It was an absolutely lovely day! I made my famous pesto pasta!! I made enough to feed an army, we had leftovers for days. Here's the recipe. Serves 4 hungry people or 6 sorta hungry people

1 pound of pasta, I like Trader Joes brown rice fusilli

1 bunch of asparagus, chopped same length as pasta

1 pound of green beans, trimmed and chopped same length as pasta

Cook the pasta per package instructions. I like my veggies to have bite to them, so I throw them in with the pasta for the last 5 minutes of cooking. Now depending on how you like your veggies adjust this time. Strain and toss with pesto[recipe below].

For Pesto

Basil, about a 1/2 cup

Spinach, about 1/2 a cup

2 cloves of garlic, more if you are a big garlic fan

1/4 cup nutritional yeast [easily found a most markets and super high in B vitamins]

3 tablespoons of pine nuts

Veggie stock, salt, and pepper

Mix all ingredients in a high powered blender or food processor. Add all ingredients then add a tablespoon of veggie stock and blend. Add veggie stock tablespoon by tablespoon until creamy. It depends on your appliance and personal taste. In my Vitamix, I find 2-3 is plenty. Add salt and pepper to taste. Pour over pasta and serve with cherry tomatoes on top! YAY SHOWERS!!!!!